Revisiting the Past - My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4 (2016-2020)
My Own Drum...
Tick tock
Tick tock
I watch time pass
By the hands of a clock
Pitter patter
Pitter pat
The days fly by so fast
Life's funny like that
Hidey ho
Hidey hum
I march to the beat
Of my own drum
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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When You Feel Deeply...
When you feel deeply
It's the little things that move you
People will say you're moody
But they don't know your depth
When you feel deeply
It's automatic
There are no "Off" switches to your emotions
You see the profound in the minute
When you feel deeply
You will listen to the same song repeatedly
The lyrics will move you to tears
They inspire you too
When you feel deeply
The smallest things will touch your heart
Tugging at your soul
Like the pounding of a roller coaster
When you feel deeply
You hide sadness in humor
When you feel deeply
You often are misunderstood
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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I'm a Scurvy Elephant...
Are you a scurvy elephant
Do you think outside the box
Do you speak what's in your heart
Without giving a second thought
Are you a scurvy elephant
Do you color outside the lines
Do you question authority when necessary
Do you speak what's on your mind
Are you a scurvy elephant
Do you voice knowledge of wrong from right
Staying true to your spirit
That's your weapon when you must fight
From the scurvy elephant
There's so much to be learned
I'm a scurvy elephant
Although not a pachyderm!
By: T.J. Christoff ©
In Honor of: Dr. Wayne Dyer
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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With O2 Flowing...
I'll don my mask
With O2 flowing
When life gets tough
Yet I must keep going
I'll rise with the birds
As dawn comes calling
After a long hard day
Into bed I'll go falling
Dreams start to come
As lids close fast
Not a thought for the future
Nor mourning of past
With covers pulled tightly
Snug 'neath my chin
Head light on pillow
O2 mask in hand
When life gets tough
Know it's not the end
Put your mask on fast
Let the O2 flow in
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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Life by It's Virtue...
Life by its virtue
Is a cautionary tale
Never stop believing
Vow to live life well
Show kindness to others
Be gentle yet bold
May the light in your heart
Nurture both young and old
Take time out
Each and every day
Cherish what matters
Give hugs and smiles away
Notice a breeze
As it kisses your face
Take a break from the battle
That is this human race
At the end of every day
Before taking your rest
Reflect for a moment
Did you give life your best
Give thanks for everything
All the joy and the pain
Nothing good comes at harvest
Without enduring the rain
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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A Four-Letter Word...
It's a four-letter word
That will change this world
For better or worse
It's a choice not a curse
It's a four-letter word
Will you love will you hate
Which will you choose
What will be your fate
It's a four-letter word
It can build up or tear down
It can strengthen families
It can destroy towns
It's a four-letter word
Your actions reveal
To love or to hate
The result you can feel
To love or to hate
What will it be
When others look in your eyes
What will they see
When it comes to hate
It's just not for me
My heart's filled with love
For all humanity
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
Image:
https://stock.adobe.com/search?k=%22love+hate+relationship%22
If a K-9 had a Bucket List...
If a K-9 had a bucket list
I wonder what on it there'd be
Perhaps to romp in a field so large
The boundaries of which the eye couldn't see
If a K-9 had a bucket list
I think it would long for a gentle touch
A special toy to play with
Is not asking for too much
If a K-9 had a bucket list
I think it would want to go for a ride
And a yard to dig a hole in
For a bone that it could hide
If a K-9 had a bucket list
Perhaps it would want a place to call home
A bed and human to share it with
And lots of room to roam
If a K-9 had a bucket list
It would want to chase a ball
Go running just as fast as it could
At the sound of its human's call
If a K-9 had a bucket list
It would want to swim in a lake
Have a birthday celebration
Complete with ice cream and doggy cake
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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Designed Perfectly for Me...
I saw the sun rise
Watched the birth of a new day
Through half-closed eyes
Saw dark of night fade away
I felt the warmth
Of rays on my skin
Never getting too hot
Thanks to occasional wind
I sat for a bit
Contemplating my day
Taking note of two squirrels
Enjoing their play
As I surveilled the sights
Laid out just ahead
Birds singing in trees
Beautiful flowers in beds
Without a doubt
In my mind I could see
This place in time
Was designed perfectly for me
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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Fonder Days...
As I sit and watch
Small children play
My thoughts drift back
To fonder days
I see myself
Young again
Playing kick-the-can
With family and friends
There were softball games
Lots of basketball too
On hot summer days
Playing shark in the pool
Fun baling hay
Out on the farm
Sleeping under the stars
Being celestially charmed
The memories I have
I will hold onto
I am grateful for both
The old and the new
As I sit and watch
These children play
I smile as I think
They're creating fonder days
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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I Noticed You Today...
I noticed you today
Sitting all alone
I watched you for awhile
Before making my way back home
I noticed you today
As you dug through cans of trash
Searching for a bite to eat
Knowing it just might be your last
I noticed you today
As you slept there on the ground
I watched the crowds pass by you
Seldom ever looking down
I noticed you today
Sitting there upon that bench
Feeding your dog what scraps you'd found
Just quietly taking your rest
I noticed you today
I chose to catch your eye
As I asked if I could sit with you
I noticed you softly start to cry
I noticed you today
I placed my hand upon your chest
I prayed for your protection
That you would withstand life's weary tests
As I noticed you today
I felt the Angels gather near
Their overwhelming presence
A reminder there is no need for fear
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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On a Path to Self-Destruction...
I take a deep breath
As my heart starts racing
Streets rampant with violence
For love it's hate I see replacing
All over social media
It's left versus right
Friends deleting friends
The result of political fights
The energy is shifting
Throughout this great Nation
Tensions steadily rising
It's massive divisions we are facing
You call yourself civil
But civil went out the door
With your chaos and destruction
You've become what you abhor
The toppling of monuments
Murdering of massed persons
The repetitive news coverage
Seems like clockwork to worsen
Like a rat on a wheel
This country is moving
On a path to self-destruction
Born of it's citizen's own choosing
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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My Blessing Test...
The words come in gentle whispers
Quietly speaking to my soul
At times keeping me from sleeping
To be penned into life their pressing goal
I cover my head with pillows
I only want to take my rest
But the words grow more persistent
Perhaps this is my Blessing Test
I surrender to the voices
Becoming louder in my head
Turning on a table lamp
I pull myself upright in bed
Grabbing pen and paper
Which seems always close at hand
I'm amazed as words pour out freely
From first until the end
While I've no doubt where they come from
I know not why they come through me
But I'm grateful for the gift
And the pen that sets them free
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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Country Farm Life...
I love the smell
Of straw and hay
It takes me back
To the good old days
Working the farm
With my best friend
From dawn to dusk
The work had no end
Finally whenever
For the day all was done
And stars replaced
Hot burning sun
You could find us there
Lying on the ground
Sharing words and laughter
And contemplative sound
How I would love
If just for one day
To work the farm again
Smell the freshly cut hay
Lay on the ground
Next to my best friend
Talk and laugh
Contemplate life again
To get lost in the aura
Of country farm life
Singing crickets and bullfrogs
And blinking fireflies
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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At the Bridge by Heaven's Gate...
The day I lost my shadow
Was the day my heart stood still
The moment I felt her slip away
I had prayed it was irreal
I knew she would be leaving soon
This shadow I'd loved so dear
Had become the better part of me
My companion through the years
I held her close and kissed her head
As the tears streamed down my face
Knowing deep in the depths of my soul
No other could take her place
She's only been gone a short while now
And yet for an eternity she has lived
Running in fields of flowers
Waiting to meet me at the Bridge
Every day that passes here on earth
I find I'm looking for signs of her
From chewed up toys she left behind
To precious golden locks of fur
Until she sees me standing there
For now I'll patiently wait
To see my shadow wagging her tail
At the Bridge by Heaven's Gate
By: T.J. Christoff ©
For: Yoda
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
Image:
Personal collection
Beautiful Memories...
I sure miss my baby girl
My Yoda Lady Who
I miss my little shadow
I miss my Punkin' Do
I miss your soft sweet muzzle
Those pointy Shepherd ears
The soulful way you looked at me
Would chase away my fears
Your tufts of fur like stuffings
Left lying about the house
You were always at my feet
Quiet as an old church mouse
When cancer attacked your body
You fought back like a champ
Knocking it out in the fourth round
It didn't stand a chance
I watched oft' times amused
As the scenes coursed through your head
While you ran barking through fields of flowers
Chasing bunnies as you slept on my bed
I sure do miss you, Yoda
My sweet little Punkin' Do
You left me with such beautiful memories
And I thank God for you!
By: T.J. Christoff ©
For : Yoda
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
Image:
Personal collection
My Vulnerability...
I'm speaking to you now
From a place within my soul
A place not oft' times seen
A place I seldom go
I'm choosing to let you see
The hidden part of me
A place of much discomfort
It's my vulnerability
Some might think me strong
After all that I've been through
But the truth is I'm no different
Then any of the rest of you
Though I fight to see the positive
When life turns upside down
There are days when I'm left feeling
Completely lost and overwhelmed
I've never been very good
At expressing what's deep inside
When I'm feeling scared or hurt
It's the fear I seek most to hide
It's at those times you'll notice
If you really want to see
The most fragile part of who I am
The most vulnerable part of me
The signs are pretty obvious
As the words I speak turn few
I turn to the darkest depths of despair
Looking for a better view
Somehow I've always managed
To claw my way back out
Though seldom without causalities
Lending itself to future doubt
Pity not this weary soul
For you have struggled too
Please trust I view tomorrow
As when life starts anew
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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You Rescued Me...
I will never forget the day
The day that you chose me
You jumped into my lap
Kissing my chin and then my cheek
You let me know right then
That you were meant for me
Through circumstance and time
This was a truth I came to see
We had our share of adventures
As my co-pilot you were the best
No matter the length of our journeys
You stayed by my side and took no rest
You fought off water monsters
With virtually every shower I took
Barking until you felt me safe
Followed by your most satisfied look
I knew this day would come
Yet it feels all way too soon
That I should have to let you go
It's hard to imagine my life without you
I hope you will hold in your spirit
All the love I have for you
And know that you rescued me
Just as much as I rescued you
By: T.J. Christoff ©
For: Glamour
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
Image:
Personal collection
Draw, Win, or Lose...
There are moments in life
Which bring about pain
Trust your fight to endure
Will not be in vain
Open your heart
Forgive those who've wronged you
Recall you are not perfect
You've no doubt wronged some too
Take time to play
With every chance you get
Remember kick-the-can?
Or, "Tag, now you're it!"?
No matter how difficult
Your life has become
Laughter and joy
Is for all not just some
Know you can decide
Yes, you get to choose
How you'll respond to life
Draw, win, or lose
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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Collecting Heart Pieces...
picked up the pieces
With tears glued them together
A process that felt
Would take me forever
With kid gloves I'd asked you
To handle my heart
To be kind and gentle
Not to tear it apart
If you had looked closely
You would have seen the scars there
From a heart too oft' broken
The damage hard to repair
Yet here I am now again
All alone once more
Collecting heart pieces
Scattered 'bout on the floor
With glue made from tears
As like many times before
I'll mend my heart back together
Lift myself off the floor
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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The Light Which Fills My Soul...
God's the rudder
That steers this ship
Through seas both high and low
Regardless how oft'
I'm cast about
I'm safe from depths below
Though damaged bow
From time to time
May stymie this soul's course
My sails will stand
All fully mast
Despite some gale wind's force
Neither fear nor doubt
May enter in
Disrupting this vessels goal
Of traveling upon
The waves of light
The light which fills my soul
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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Mom's Christmas Cookies...
Every year at Christmas
All the kids would gather 'round
To savor sweet confections
There were plenty to be found
From early in the morning
'til late into the eve'
We sat and watched intently
Refusing to take our leave
For every year at Christmas
From out of floury mess
Would rise those sour milk cookies
The one's the Germans loved the best
To us it mattered not the shape
Those cut-out cookies took
With sprinkles and colored icing
Mom gave each a festive look
Though each cookie was cut with precision
There was something only a child could know
The best part of the cookie
Came in sneaking bites of dough
While at times she tried to catch us
As we picked and pulled the dough
Lookig back I finally realize
There was something we kids didn't know
Mom would often turn her back
So that dough her kids could sneak
I recall a smile grew 'cross her face
As she turned her head to peek
I sure do miss mom's cookies
Yet I miss my mom much more
So I'll hold tight to these memories
They're the one's I've come to adore
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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Victory Came...
Victory came
The battle had finally ended
Some peace restored to a tormented heart
The tears
Liquid bandages over invisible wounds
The pain known only to the warrior
Healing begins
Nightmares fade with morning light
Letting go, a new battle has begun
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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What I Wanted to See...
No one knows
How I fall apart
When I no longer contain
My emotion-filled heart
No one sees
Me trembling in pain
Begging to go home
Knowing my longing's in vain
No one listens
As I cry in the night
Exhausted and weary
Wanting to give up the fight
No one knows
That I scare even me
Knowing I chose this life
It's what I wanted to see
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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I Chose to Name You Oscar...
You chose to take up residence
In a place you shouldn't be
You chose to make your home
In a place inside of me
I chose to name you Oscar
I chose to have no fear
I chose to embrace my journey
To embrace all that I hold dear
So tell me won't you Oscar
Are you here as friend or foe
You chose to live inside of me
So it's only fair that I should know
What are your intentions
As inside of me you grow
Have you come to take my life
Is your answer "Yes" or "No"?
Your presence does not scare me
It does not cause me any woe
For I see eviction in your future
A time when you must go
As I watch the role you're playing
In the story of my life
I'll smile as I greet each day
You will not cause me strife
For you see I've learned a lesson
As I've traveled my life's path
No obstacle's to big for me
When I choose to look at it and laugh
Life is what you make of it
This much I've come to know
There's a time in life for everything
There's even a time to go
So tell me won't you Oscar
Won't you tell me if you can
What's your purpose in my life
How will our story end?
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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I Do Believe...
I do believe
I do believe
I do believe, I do
I do believe
I do believe
I do believe, do you
I do believe in peace
I do believe in love
I do believe God's all around
Not hidden in clouds above
I do believe in giving
In providing a helping hand
I believe in the immortality
Of the spirit of mortal man
I believe in giving a smile
In sharing a kind "hello"
I believe in the gift of talking a bit
With people I don't know
I do believe in Christmas
In the magic believing can bring
I believe in the joy that seems to come
From listening to carolers sing
I do believe
I do believe
I do believe, I do
I do believe
I do believe
I do believe, do you
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
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I Loved You the Most...
It's odd this feeling
That I feel
When I think of you
Wishing you were here
You reside in a place
Both near yet far
I trust you are well
Wherever you are
I awoke today
To thoughts of you
There was so much about you
That I never knew
When I started to awake
I could feel you close
Upon opening my eyes
You became like a ghost
The image I'd held
Of you in my mind
Upon opening my eyes
I could scarcely more find
I miss you mom
Yet I hold you close
You may have loved me
But I loved you the most
By: T.J. Christoff ©
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
Image:
Personal collection
Doing Zoomies...
How do I begin to say
All I'm feeling in my heart
There's love and joy and pain and sadness
But that is just the start
You showered me with so much love
As you would kiss and nibble my chin
There were so many times you made me laugh
As your zoomies through the house you'd begin
You were such a sweet little soul
Giant heart housed in tiny frame
With eyes as clear and blue as crystal
Sasha Azule became your name
Your journey here on earth was short
But you lived each day so grand
With ever a smile on your soft little muzzle
So oft' you'd nestle your chin in my hand
Today I had to let you go
Our time together has come to an end
And although my heart is broken now
Memories of you will help it mend
So go now my sweet Sasha girl
Like the dove upon your face
Fly across that Rainbow Bridge
Doing zoomies as you race!
By: T.J. Christoff ©
For : Sasha
My Patchwork Heart: Vol. 4
Image:
Personal collection